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Oct 2001 / the ordinary eye :: email this story to a friend

Signs That Make Kids Snicker
By Brian H. Marston

Huh, huh ... You said 'Uranus.' First, let me state the obvious and say that Matt Groening is a comic genius. His "Teachers' Guide to Words That Make Kids Snicker" in the aptly titled School is Hell was the inspiration for this compendium of funny signs around town.

Immature? Yes. Juvenile? Unh-hunh. But the next time you see one of these signs, I bet you'll giggle like a schoolgirl and wonder, "What were they thinking?" I know I did.

[Click on a thumbnail image below to enlarge it.]

St. Louis Vibrator Products
4265 Meramec
Despite its utterly nondescript digs, people are all abuzz about this company.
St. Louis Steel Erection Co.
5112 Wise
I thought long and hard about a description for this one, but decided to leave it as an exercise for the reader.
Swing-A-Way Manufacturing Company
4100 Beck
I can't say the name of this company without picturing Jon Lovitz's Harvey Firestein character gleefully exhorting guests to swing away.
John Ramming Machine Co.
4591 McRee
What do they do? Stuff toilets? Build colorfully-named devices for prostitutes? Enquiring minds in the gutter want to know.
Standard Artificial Limbs
1904 Olive
Call me uppity, but I'd never buy a body part off the rack.
Nooter Corporation
1400 S Third
Nooter. Nooter. Say it a few times. It sounds vaguely naughty and silly, doesn't it?
Mednik Wiping Materials Co.
4245 Forest Park
Mr. Whipple would be proud.
All-Die Incorporated
6009 Manchester
Finally, a company that caters to the homicidal maniac in all of us.

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